![]() ![]() Thankfully, I learned the value of meditating on Scripture. I desperately wanted God to lighten my darkness. “For it is you who light my lamp the LORD my God lightens my darkness” (ESV). It wasn’t the first time I’d read this verse, but this time, its message “took.” It says, ![]() I sought Christian counseling and spent as much time as I could praying and reading the Bible.ĭuring this time I came across Psalm 18:28. I knew instinctively if I didn’t begin (once and for all) to trust God, the darkness would overtake me for good. By the time I was in my 20s, the emotional darkness closed in. The regrets in my life seemed to outweigh the good things I’d done – by a huge margin. ![]() My relentless need to be loved and accepted drove me to unhealthy relationships, which left emotional scars.Įvery time someone hurt me, my outlook on life grew dimmer. I suffered from serious depression, eating disorders, and other destructive behavior. If I wasn’t the top achiever among my peers, then I was convinced I was the most worthless person in the world. My self-esteem was determined by what I did or didn’t accomplish or by what others thought of me. I struggled with self-hate and all that goes with it beginning in my teens. ![]()
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